Lady Beetlejuice

Listen up, ladies who like to dress as sexy insert film or television character here every Halloween! Forever 21 has made their first, clear cut addition to the many clothing items in their catalog which can be used for costumes.

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Bold Stripes Shirt: $13.50

Vertical Striped Skirt: $19.80

Oh, but the resemblance is striking.

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Now all you need is the right wig, makeup or mask.

Forever 21…

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WTF?

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What a Steal!

What’s this?

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Turns out there wasn’t a lot of demand for a jacket so sad it cries fake suede tears.

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Forever 21, Thanks for the Discount but … No Thanks.

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Cupid’s Picks

As a special treat for Valentine’s Day shoppers, Forever 21 has rolled out a list of gifts personally picked by Cupid, chief among them being sticks of sexual dynamite like this doozy.

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Poisoned Love Fringe Top: $14.80

Sometimes Forever 21′s picks are way off the mark, but I have to give it to them this year. A top like that is sure to make the lampshade of your dreams go ga-ga!

What’s that you say? You mean to tell me you didn’t plan to spend this Valentine’s Day cooking a sumptuous meal for, romancing, reading poetry to and then subsequently banging the shit out of a lampshade by candlelight?

You wanted to attracted a human BEING with this top?

Fine. More for me then.

Forever 21, Furniture Matchmaker.

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What to Wear When you Fall in Love with Channing Tatum

Sometimes the most obvious things in the world can be the most surprising. Like finding a quicker route to work by taking a wrong turn or learning that ratty old sweater you lounge around in at home is the sexiest thing he’s ever seen.

In this way, I guess I had every right to be surprised by the fact that a large majority of you enjoy the pouty lips, soulful eyes and perfectly sculpted abs of Channing Tatum, co-star to Rachel McAdams in this coming Valentine’s Day’s chick flick epic “The Vow.”

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In what is sure to be the first guilty pleasure pic of thousands of people in 2012, “The Vow” tells the based on a true story tale of a married couple whose deep and profound love is torn asunder by a case of amnesia. Rachel McAdams’ character awakes from a coma or, something equally soap operish, to discover the cut and beautiful, model turned actor Tatum is her husband.

She then inexplicably objects, speaking nonsense in the trailer like, “I don’t remember you” and “You are devilishly handsome and extremely physical fit. Back up off me!” Okay, maybe she doesn’t say that, but how she musters the gaul to do anything but rip her own clothes off at the news this god amongst men is her surprise husband is beyond me.

Thus, in the spirit of pleasant surprises and full on pleasures of the guilty variety, this Wonderful Wednesday is dedicated to capturing the style of the woman (albeit fictional) so appealing she caused Channing Tatum to full press court her (twice!) in hopes of winning her love.

Strap on your longing looks, ladies. This is Wonderful Wednesday.

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Cable Knit Boyfriend Cardigan: $19.80

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Wrap Cardigan: $32.80

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Toggle Closure Cardigan: $37.90

Theres something to be said for being comfortable making you feel more sexy. One of the most romantic days I’ve ever experienced was spent at home with my then boyfriend on a rainy day in LA while I was in my period. Both of us spent the entire time slubbing around in the toasty confines on his apartment, me bundled up in a long thrift store cable cardigan, a thin tee and yoga pants. He was never more eager to surf the crimson tide. I’m assuming Channing Tatum feels the same.

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Pom Pom Hat: $10.80

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Heart Trimmed Necklace: $4.80

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Faded Denim Shirt: $22.80

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Moto-Bomber Jacket: $16.99

Make sure when you put this outfit together you have twinkly, sparkly lights to halo your frame. That way when Channing Tatum somehow, against all odds, despite his strong jaw and no doubt firm, round rump, convinces you to fall in love with him again the moment will be all the more magical.

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V-neck Tee: $5.90

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Floral Cuffed Sleeve Top: $22.80

Wearing something with flowers is key to this moment in the seduction of you by Channing Tatum. Mainly because when he comes rushing into your art studio, or sculpting class, or cheese curdling factory or wherever the Hell they are, he will be subconsciously motivated to pollinate your flower as he takes you on the cool, stone floor.

Forever 21, Wonderful.

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Award Winning Shorts

If there was an Olympic sport which awarded clothing stores for selling the ugliest pair of shorts I have ever seen, these puffers would take the gold.

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Pleated Waist Shorts: $18.01

Faux suede, camel colored with pleats that seem specifically made to be unflattering. Now there is a time and place for pleats. But that time is not now and that place is not anywhere around the crotch region.

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It’s like some poor intern is crouched just out of frame with a blow dryer pointed straight up her crotch. If you looked up “Front Butt” in the dictionary, there would be a picture of these shorts.

Forever 21, Stop Putting Pleats Where they Don’t Belong.

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WTF from Around the World: Intersect.com

For some time now, I’ve been trying with what I’d call medium level success to amass a collection of photos taken inside Forever 21 stores or photos of fabulous, intelligent, funny and amazingly good looking readers like you wearing outrageous WTF.

I’ve amassed all your contributions onto WTForever 21′s Intersect.com profile and made this dope map and timeline, which you can interact with and contribute to by signing up for Intersect.com.

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The photos you’ve sent in are a great start, but I’d like to keep building! Sign up and send me your reader WTF and I’ll feature it here where literally billions of people will see it (eventually) and place it on the map and timeline for a mysterious future mystery project I’m working on. I’ll give you a hint - don’t send something in if you object to being on The Huffington Post.

Love and Lulz, Chickens! Send in those WTFs!

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Valentine’s Day Outfits

Valentine’s Day outfit.

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You are doing it.

You are doing it all wrong.

Forever 21, WTF?

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Old School WTF

It’s been a good long while since I scoped something in Forever 21′s online catalog that literally made me say, “What the fuck?” out loud.

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Polka Dot Flowers Top: $13.80

Congratulations, Polka Dot Flowers Top. You broke through that WTF dry spell like a ruffled, mismatched BOSS. And the styling addition of what appear to be piss soaked cutoffs is nothing short of inspired.

My standards are impeccable. My expectations are high. You have exceeded them this day.

Forever 21, WTF and Thank You.

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Forever 21 Mixes Street Style with WTF

You all know the poses. The familiar shoe gazing, thoughtful glances and “Oh, I didn’t notice you there. I was just lounging awkwardly in front of this brick wall” look many fashion bloggers have come to adopt.

But all navel gazing aside, many of us (myself included) have come to expect and enjoy the sometimes quirky, mostly fabulous street style of the individual girl with a budding blog or built from the ground-up personal brand. So when I saw everyone’s favorite and simultaneously not so favorite fashion retailer was getting in on the action, I didn’t really know what to think.

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Look familiar? Forever 21 recently rolled out a new lookbook of priced to move pieces, which they have dubbed their “Exclusive Designs” collection. Im assuming this means none of these items have been ripped off from anyone else. No, this cluster eff is ALL on them.

The WTF is all too familiar, with heavy favoritism paid to crochet, mesh, the ass cape trend and whatever the 9 lb baby Jesus this is:

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I can only assume that wide-eyed look is due to the approaching villagers with pitchforks and torches, just off camera.

But I digress. What’s really interesting about this new development in Forever 21′s online catalog is not the offensive levels of salmon colored, mismatched neon crochet. It’s the dilemma of whether of not this presentation tactic makes those WTFs more alluring.

I mean, does this photo make me more likely to purchase and wear a mini dress length fishing net?

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Or does this?

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Well, since it’s Friday and my brain only works at 33% power, maximum on Fridays, I’m asking YOU to BE THE JUDGE.

Let me know in the comments what you think of Forever 21′s more editorial online look.

Forever 21, Not Sure if WTF or Wonderful.

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Acid Wash Denim Jumpsuit

There comes a time in the life of every multi-national clothing retailer when they must face a challenge. A challenge seemingly insurmountable. The challenge being how to make jumpsuits more dumb.

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Button Up Denim Jumper: $37.80

Lovelies, Forever 21 has wrestled that challenge into the dirt, wrapped it in acid wash denim from head to toe and hogtied it with a good, sturdy price tag.

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Pleated fronts. *Shiver*

Side fact* - this piece was modeled after what NASCAR pit crews and house painters in Mentos commercials wear in their downtime.

Forever 21, WTF?

*Not a fact at all.

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