Everyone seems to be up in arms over Zooey Deschanel right now. Maybe it’s the overload of her kewpie doll cuteness now on full display in “New Girl” that’s brought it about.
Maybe it’s the baby voiced, chunky banged, big eyed wonder she seems to live inside. But whether you want in to her kitten filled world of cotton candy rainbow clouds and farts that smell like fresh blueberry muffins, or you just want to strangle the shit out of her, odds are you probably have an opinion.
As for me, I’m torn. Part of me is insanely jealous of her seemingly innate ability to be approachably beautiful. And yet another part of me feels like gouging my ear drums open with a blunt breadstick when I hear her bored baby talk voice.
But there is ONE thing I DO love about Zooey (with two o’s for EXTRA “awww”) - here unabashedly out there affinity for all things adorable. Which brings us to today’s special post topic,
“What Would Zooey Wear?”
Floral Bow Ring: $3.80
The cute is coming.
Floral Peter Pan Collar Dress: $13.99
What’s that? Oh, I’m sorry. I couldn’t hear you. I was too busy singing my personal theme song to myself and admiring the pleated waist band on my baby doll dress to notice you were talking.
Giraffe Print Chiffon Blouse: $17.80
Yes, those ARE teensy giraffes on my peachy colored blouse!
Thanks for noticing.
Lace Brocade Jacket: $24.80
Oh, it’s not to keep me warm. It’s to keep me ADORABLE.
Bow Waist Tulle Skirt: $17.80
If wearing a tutu like I’m a round the clock understudy for a first grade ballet recital (despite the fact that I am well over 30 years of age) is wrong, then I don’t wanna be right.
Smiling Knitted Beanie: $7.80
So what if I didn’t get that job! I think it says a whole lot more about their professional standards as an abortion clinic than it does about me as a candidate if they’re against employees wearing adorable head gear with pompom ears. I mean, jeez, lighten up!
Horse Print Bow Clips: $1.50
It’s like a stampede of whismy! On my head!
F2018 Readers: $6.80
Sure, I could see without them. But having them on makes my idiotic naivete seem ironic instead of just a nasty byproduct of years spent batting my eyelashes and ruining poor Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s LIFE.
SO – What are your thoughts on Zooey’s style? Too cute or just too much?