Leave it to Forever 21 to make a cheetah, one of the most badass, awesome, stealth, adorable when babies, animals on the planet look totally fucking lame.
Zippered Cheetah Daisy Top: $17.80
Let’s apply the same treatment to another animal and see if we can’t make it look like a desperate, old hippie whore as well.
What was once an iconic villain of my childhood is instantly reduced to the Tammy Faye Baker of prehistoric reptiles.
Newflash, Forever 21 – cheetahs and raptors do not need pink eye shadow to look awesome.
Forever 21, WTF?
Sorry to be the bearer of whack-ass news…
Check Out My Swag Tee: $14.90
But if you have to instruct someone to check out your swag, it was never swag in the first place.
Forever 21, Don’t Encourage People to Use the Word “Swag”
Most people don’t understand sign language, but almost everyone in the developed world can recognize a few choice hand signals.
Hand signals like “Thumbs Up.”
Thumps Up/Down Cropped Tee: $12.90
and “The Showstopper.”
If only Facebook would incorporate these. We could get rid of commenting all together and every response would be a different variation of “YES.”
Come on, Zuckerberg! Get your shit together.
Black Widow Tank Top: $13.80
I know its a comic character but, what is this? Is that her vagina’s thought bubble?
You know, I might actually buy this if they change the word “widow” to “vagina.” At least then the bizarre placement of the word on this tank would make more sense.
Also, I’ve always wanted a top with the word vagina on it since forever.
Forever 21, WTF?
Oh, hey! Guess Forever 21 restocked that Flipper tee everyone was all up in arms about and was reporting that they took down because of some pressure or fear of being sued by Courtney Love.
Flipper Graphic Tee: $16.90
Maybe Forever 21 isn’t afraid of everyone’s favorite rock widow and Hole front lady. Or maybe the blogging community who “reported” on this without actually doing any research or qualifying any statements needs to do their fucking JOBS in the future.
When the story about Forever 21 allegedly “stealing Kurt Cobain’s original t-shirt design” was first reported about, and picked up, and re-reported about, music and fashion blogs at large pounced on it like a group of hungover frat boys on stale pizza – topping off the already poorly researched post that started it all with new info and blatantly unethical assumptions that Forever 21 had removed the tee because they feared a legal battle with Love.
Not only did most of them fail to point out the shirt, which they alleged is Cobain’s design, was being sold at online retailer WornFree.com for $45, they also failed to mention the dead eyed dolphin depicted on the tee is the mascot of band Flipper and predates Cobain’s alleged doodle.
But what REALLY got my cameltoe panties in a twist was the reporting that Forever 21 had removed the product the same day this “story” was posted, when in actuality the item was simply listed as out of stock and has now returned to Forever 21′s online store.
As you all know, I am Forever 21′s biggest critic and also one of their biggest fans and have criticized them for everything from their shoddy stitch work to their tasteless product shots, but this blatant bad reporting and unethical assumption machine that went to work on Forever 21 over what is essentially a discounted band tee was completely out of order.
Recently, a blogger in Oregon was hit with a $2.5 million fine from a judge who said she wasn’t a journalist and therefore could not enjoy any of the protections a journalist would in court. Some might say the judge was out of touch or has a prejudice but I say he’s making an example.
Forever 21 and the Flipper tee fiasco is just a very small instance of why traditional media is still on the fence about bloggers. Even Rolling Stone’s blog “Thread Count” couldn’t be bothered to issue any kind of correction or retraction on this and would only go so far as to call their latest post with clarification from Forever 21′s team an “update.”
Online only journalists, bloggers, whatever you want to call them, have got to start doing a better job if they want the public at large, and courts in certain states no less, to start taking them ALL seriously.
Come on Blogosphere! WTF?
In what I’m entirely convinced is an effort to net cash from the coveted hipster boi consumer segment, Forever 21 has rolled out what is quite possibly the douchiest fucking tee I have ever laid my poor, puffy, red eyes on.
Classic Tee with Scarf: $18.90
It’s a slim cut tee with a skinny scarf ATTACHED to it. They might as well call it the “I’m sure you’ve never heard of this band I love. They’re pretty obscure” tee.
All that’s missing now is a pair of dick strangling jeans and a Spock haircut, along with a sleeve of tattoos that hold absolutely no significance to you what so ever. Basically, this tee is the main ingredient in the Privileged Hipster emergency kit.
I’ll bet that scarf only drinks fair trade coffee, too.
Forever 21, Corporations like you are the REAL Enemy, Man. You Don’t Even Know. Let’s Meet Up at Starbucks and Talk About it While we Smoke Parliament Cigarettes.