Ugh. It’s like the mutant spawn of one of Michael Jackson’s gloves.
Sequin Jacket with Hood: $32.80
The next leap in looking creepy and insane at your molestation trial has arrived. For once I think the styling choice in this photo is entirely appropriate. What better way to show people you’re a normal adult, worthy of their trust, who isn’t a sex pervert than to strap some awkwardly baggy pleather shorts to your almost non-existent rump for when you waltz into your court date four hours late?
If you like this hoodie, fine, as always, wear it. Be my guest.
Just don’t blame me when the dead and Paula Abdul rise around you and start forcing you to participate in intricately choreographed dance numbers.
In the past few weeks I’ve received a record amount of emails and links in comment threads about one dress.
A dress so WTF it seems to have captured the attentions and captivated the minds of literally handfuls of you.
Coated Party Dress: $19.80
Yes, coated. A lot of your have asked, “Coated with what?”
And I have to answer, “Isn’t it obvious?”
Coated with swag. Coated with confidence, class and high-shine polyester… Probably mostly high shine polyester, though. I mean, a GIA certified diamond would be jealous. A GIA, I TELL YOU! Look how she sparkles.
And this isn’t just some form of bondage picnic wear or something from Cat Woman’s casual wardrobe, oh no. Not only is this dress great for cocktail parties, you can also turn it inside out when you’re done and toss trash in it for easy clean up.
That’s called multi-tasking. And value.
Forever 21, WTF?