They’re what drives the Internet, what makes it, and keeps us yearning, churning, day after day, distracting us from our humdrum little lives. They get billions of hits and appeal to everyone from the tiniest tot to the oldest codger. They’re watching you from the ceiling. They’re in your computer eating your interwebs. And they’re CONSTANTLY asking for cheeseburgers.
They’re also apparently what makes us strap on tits-to-toe stretchy, leopard print lace jogging suits and roll around on the floor for 15 minutes.
Lace Leopard Jacket: $19.80
Lace Leopard Leggings: $13.80
I know this looks bad, but hear me out – I have absolutely no good explanation for this scene.
It started out innocently enough with a Redbook article from 1977 that listed “18 Ways to Feel Prettier – Right Now!” One of which was a suggestion to unleash your animal instincts by working in a sassy splash of animal print in your everyday wardrobe. Animal print? Sassy? Everyday? Wardrobe? The hunt was on. And as with most trends, I think I took it a little too far.
So, okay, it’s not so much a splash as it is a big ol’ tidal wave of WTF, but when I saw the leggings and matching jacket in the Forever 21 store tonight I gasped. These twins of synthetic wonder were just what I needed to spice things up around the old homestead. Or the laundry mat. Or the post office. Or at my boyfriend’s place of business. Where ever. And at the very least, they could be reused in October as a last minute cat costume of some kind. All I need is the ears and tail and no one has to know I wore this to run errands at Safeway two days prior.
It’s sheer, it’s probably HIGHLY flammable and it illicits the wrong kind of attention in a Safeway parking lot, but, damnit, I have to admit, it was fun to wear, and for a cheapo, slutty Halloween costume on the fly, it ain’t too shabby. I still don’t know why Forever 21 puts what is clearly meant to be worn as a Halloween costume or outfit for a Purim parade in their normal rotation of street wear. I suppose some mysteries, like LOLcats and women who wear head-to-toe leopard print, were never meant to be solved.
Forever 21, I Can Has Cheezburger?