Tag Archives: leopard

Reader WTF: Leopard Panel Maxi Skirt

Every so often, a brave reader takes it upon themselves to  step into the polyester trenches of Forever 21 and blast their body with tacky shit like a Jersey Shore reject in a tanning booth.

Leopard Panel Maxi Skirt: $19.80

Today, Melissa and Lindsey took the Leopard Panel challenge. The results? Ever so fucking sweet.

“My best friend and I are avid readers of WTForever21.com and honestly we constantly talk about how we’re surprised we didn’t create this website first haha…so as we were browsing through our local Forever21 in Tallahassee today, we came across this little gem and snapped a pic of my friend Melissa (who quickly slipped it on over her pants to avoid the 25-person long line for the fitting room) wearing it. It’s zoo-a-lisciously dreadful. Enjoy.”

Enjoy, indeed, my friends.

Forever 21, GTL (Gym, Tan Leopard Print).

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Sheer High-Low Trapeze Shirt

Have you ever seen a human-sized costume of a flying squirrel competing in a drag contest?

Sheer High-Low Trapeze Shirt: $15.80

You have now.

Forever 21, NUTS.

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Wild and Out: Animal Pimp

There are some clothes that transform the wearer.

Some for the better and some for the worse…

The following items were seemingly designed to turn any normal woman into a certified Jungle Pimp in 5 seconds flat.

Cropped Cheetah Print Jacket: $19.80

 This cropped cheetah jacket says you have animal magnetism.

It also says that Bonobo better have your money.

Zebra Print Loafers: $22.80

Want to keep your pimp foot strong? You will feel like the queen of the jungle when you slip on these striped loafers and struck yo’ muthafuckin’ way through the track on the tundra.

CHURCH.

Wild Chain Link Headwrap: $6.80

Every smoove player who has made a name for themselves in the sex for coconuts game needs a trademark piece.

Don’t sleep on this wild ass chain and leopard combo. Let ya mane flow.

Forever 21, Jungle Pimpin’ Ain’t Easy But Its Estuary.

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Manga Maven: WTForever 21 Fully Animated

I am so excited about this, I just can’t even begin.

The lovely Joanna from www.maqaroon.com created this awesome manga portrait of me in all the WTF accouterments.

OBSERVE!

Obnoxiously bright headband with large rosettes!

Many chunky bangles in neon colors!

Demented owl necklace!

Furry vest!

Leopard print fringe body suit!!

This is damn masterpiece.

….

Check out other street style manga portraits on Joanna’s blog: http://www.maqaroon.com/blog.php

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Plus-Size Problems

It’s been too long since we took a look at the torture Forever 21 is trying to inflict on big girl bodies across the globe and what better way to kick off the weekend than to re-ignite the debate about whether plus-size ladies should ever wear leopard print leggings.

Shall we delve deeper into the fanciful world of Forever 21′s XXL collection?

Sleek Leopard Leggings: $15.80

LET’S SHALL.

Beat as One Top: $13.80

The cropping on this one is rather unfortunate.

Capri Harem Pants: $17.80

I’m going to tell you something and you’re not going to like it.

Those “capri harem pants” you’re doing that sassy little pose in? Those pants that look to be cutting off your circulation at the waist and ankle, resulting in a build up of flesh right around where your ass should be?

Those is sweatpants, boo. Sweatpants pretending to be capri pants, no less. I guess at least when you’re sweating it out at the club you’ll be appropriately dressed.

Before I even tell you what this is, let’s play a little guessing game to see if you can figure it out just by the photo.

Is it a hair tie meant to accent your Black Swan costume this year?

Is it a church lady hat?

Is it a cat toy?

All wrong.

Feather Front Stretch Belt: $5.80

It’s a belt. Because that’s just what every woman wants. A mess of feathers hovering above her lady parts like a black vulture anus.

Forever 21, WTF?

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How to Wear Faux Fur

I know what you’re thinking.

“Rachel! You HATE faux fur! You think it’s overall tacky and it makes you sneeze and it’s itchy and you have no idea how to wash it!”

If that’s what you’re thinking, you are thinking wrong, because after today’s trip to Forever 21 I have discovered I LOVE faux fur. I’ve just been wearing it wrong.

BOOM.

Leopard Top: $22.80

Leopard Leggings: $10.80

Purple Faux Fur Vest: $29.80

Grey Faux Fur Vest: $37.80

There it is, chickies. Soak it in. The only way to wear faux fur properly is to wear IT ALL AT ONCE and WITH LEOPARD PRINT.

Now, again, I know what you’re thinking.

“This bitch has lost her damn mind. She looks like a gender confused woolly mammoth.”

IF that’s what you’re thinking, you’re again thinking wrong. This ish is the height of fashion.

You just don’t get it.

And I feel sorry for you. Hate on me haters. I do not have time to explain fashion to you or why I ‘m dressed like a Russian Bond villain.

Forever 21, Furtastic.

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GIVEAWAY: Free Cat Costume (Kind of)

I’m sure you all remember the cat suit I wore in one of Le Costume posts here which feature Forever 21 clothes that could easily be worn as Halloween costumes. Well, just in time for Halloween, I’ve decided to raffle off the suit (brand new – NOT the actual suit I wore. That would be … weird. But if you’d like me to put it on before I send it, that can be arranged, you sick, sick person.) to one lucky reader!

Lace Leopard Jacket: $19.80 (size L)

Lace Leopard Leggings: $13.80 (size L)

All you’ll need is some fuzzy ears and a tail – BAM! Cat Lady Halloween costume (the good kind).

All you have to do to put yourself in the running for this Halloween costume is leave a comment on this post (make sure to include your email in the form so I can get a hold of you for your mailing address later) and tell us all a story about your favorite Halloween costume, EVER!

PLEASE, try to remember to place your email in the form as I want to get this to the winner in AMPLE time for them to wear it on Halloween. I purchased both in large because I figured the stretchy material will form to fit whatever size and certainly won’t be baggy on a size small.

I’ll select a winner next Tuesday at midnight, 10/5!

GOOD LUCK!

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Dress Like There’s Nobody Watching

Well before the dawn of modern Hipsterdom, adventurous young men and women began flirting with the fashion line between counter culture trends and just plain looking like you got dressed in the damn dark. In the photo below (sent to me by the very Diva-licious Aldo of WhatHadHappa.com) a brave mannequin at the Forever 21 in Salinas, CA took the whole “mirrors or eyes or a sense of  complimentary colors and patterns are SO mainstream” look to a different level this weekend.

The hideousness of this ensemble is, I assume, without question, but there is one mystery still to be uncovered in this unfortunate photo (well, besides the obvious “Why would you ever do this?”).

Is that mannequin … or a MANnequin? As in, a statue with testosterone? As in, meant to be wearing male clothing? Our intrepid photographer tells us he spied this delight in the lady’s section but I am dubious. The legs are pin thin enough and the shoulders are far too broad for a Forever 21 women’s display.

What do you all think? Does this dude look like a lady or does this lady just look like a douche?

Forever 21, WTF?

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Forever 21: New York Style

Ah, New York.

The city that never sleeps holds so many different worlds from block to block, borough to bridge. But as vastly unique as they are, the hipster styles in Williamsburg and the haute couture collections or ready-to-wear revelations sashaying down catwalks all over NY Fashion Week have got at least ONE thing in common: Come some moment very soon, there will probably be a mass manufactured, priced down version spilling forth from the never ending inventory of Forever 21.

This week I was fortunate enough to attend Lucky Magazine’s FABB Conference in the big city and, of course, I made a stop to that Mecca of cheap fashion finds we all love and loathe so much, Forever 21.

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It was like being in an awkward, multi-floor orgy of rhinestones, leopard print, tacky tribals, leatherette, faux fur and rosettes. And I’ve got the pics to prove it.

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These mannequins are either runners up at a Joan Jett lookalike contest or just fans of hard rock mullet. Either way, the trend of poorly executed tribal prints continues into Fall. I’m fairly certain I’ve seen that fabric on the middle dress covering a patio pillow somewhere. Having clothes made of old Sunbrella swatches is not a plus for me.

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When is Forever 21 going to learn? Capturing and then shaving street animals and abnormally large sewer rats for their precious fur is wrong! Not so much for PETA’s sake, but for the sake of shoppers’ EYES. My torso itches just looking at that vest.

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Where exactly is she going wearing this? A prostitute audition in 1983 and then a Motley Crüe concert afterwards? Forever 21, I do not want to keep telling you this but you have GOT to stop harnessing the miracle of time travel for the sole purpose of bringing back terrible outfits. I mean, you could be doing some serious good with that, like stopping everyone from wearing polka dot leggings and telling Mariah Carey to enjoy her hot body and sanity while it lasts. So selfish.

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Quite a bit of floor space was devoted to leopard prints in the Times Square Forever 21 location and I can see why: Forever 21 makes a SHITLOAD of leopard print stuff. It was like peering into the closet of one of the Real Housewives of New Jersey on crack. I half expected Teresa to come barging in, flip one of the tables and call me a prostitution whore.

Wait, I think I meant I HOPED she would.

Forever 21 Times Square New York, WTForgettaboutit!

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Le Costume Post: Part 1

CATS.

They’re what drives the Internet, what makes it, and keeps us yearning, churning, day after day, distracting us from our humdrum little lives. They get billions of hits and appeal to everyone from the tiniest tot to the oldest codger. They’re watching you from the ceiling. They’re in your computer eating your interwebs. And they’re CONSTANTLY asking for cheeseburgers.

They’re also apparently what makes us strap on tits-to-toe stretchy, leopard print lace jogging suits and roll around on the floor for 15 minutes.

Lace Leopard Jacket: $19.80

Lace Leopard Leggings: $13.80

I know this looks bad, but hear me out – I have absolutely no good explanation for this scene.

It started out innocently enough with a Redbook article from 1977 that listed “18 Ways to Feel Prettier – Right Now!”  One of which was a suggestion to unleash your animal instincts by working in a sassy splash of animal print in your everyday wardrobe. Animal print? Sassy? Everyday? Wardrobe? The hunt was on. And as with most trends, I think I took it a little too far.

So, okay, it’s not so much a splash as it is a big ol’ tidal wave of WTF, but when I saw the leggings and matching jacket in the Forever 21 store tonight I gasped. These twins of synthetic wonder were just what I needed to spice things up around the old homestead. Or the laundry mat. Or the post office. Or at my boyfriend’s place of business. Where ever. And at the very least, they could be reused in October as a last minute cat costume of some kind. All I need is the ears and tail and no one has to know I wore this to run errands at Safeway two days prior.

It’s sheer, it’s probably HIGHLY flammable and it illicits the wrong kind of attention in a Safeway parking lot, but, damnit, I have to admit, it was fun to wear, and for a cheapo, slutty Halloween costume on the fly, it ain’t too shabby. I still don’t know why Forever 21 puts what is clearly meant to be worn as a Halloween costume or outfit for a Purim parade in their normal rotation of street wear. I suppose some mysteries, like LOLcats and women who wear head-to-toe leopard print, were never meant to be solved.

Forever 21, I Can Has Cheezburger?

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