Forever 21: New York Style

Ah, New York.

The city that never sleeps holds so many different worlds from block to block, borough to bridge. But as vastly unique as they are, the hipster styles in Williamsburg and the haute couture collections or ready-to-wear revelations sashaying down catwalks all over NY Fashion Week have got at least ONE thing in common: Come some moment very soon, there will probably be a mass manufactured, priced down version spilling forth from the never ending inventory of Forever 21.

This week I was fortunate enough to attend Lucky Magazine’s FABB Conference in the big city and, of course, I made a stop to that Mecca of cheap fashion finds we all love and loathe so much, Forever 21.

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It was like being in an awkward, multi-floor orgy of rhinestones, leopard print, tacky tribals, leatherette, faux fur and rosettes. And I’ve got the pics to prove it.

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These mannequins are either runners up at a Joan Jett lookalike contest or just fans of hard rock mullet. Either way, the trend of poorly executed tribal prints continues into Fall. I’m fairly certain I’ve seen that fabric on the middle dress covering a patio pillow somewhere. Having clothes made of old Sunbrella swatches is not a plus for me.

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When is Forever 21 going to learn? Capturing and then shaving street animals and abnormally large sewer rats for their precious fur is wrong! Not so much for PETA’s sake, but for the sake of shoppers’ EYES. My torso itches just looking at that vest.

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Where exactly is she going wearing this? A prostitute audition in 1983 and then a Motley Crüe concert afterwards? Forever 21, I do not want to keep telling you this but you have GOT to stop harnessing the miracle of time travel for the sole purpose of bringing back terrible outfits. I mean, you could be doing some serious good with that, like stopping everyone from wearing polka dot leggings and telling Mariah Carey to enjoy her hot body and sanity while it lasts. So selfish.

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Quite a bit of floor space was devoted to leopard prints in the Times Square Forever 21 location and I can see why: Forever 21 makes a SHITLOAD of leopard print stuff. It was like peering into the closet of one of the Real Housewives of New Jersey on crack. I half expected Teresa to come barging in, flip one of the tables and call me a prostitution whore.

Wait, I think I meant I HOPED she would.

Forever 21 Times Square New York, WTForgettaboutit!

14 Comments

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14 Responses to Forever 21: New York Style

  1. FashionBoys

    Forever 21 as whole in styling gets a huge WTF !, but some of their cheapily made BS isn’t all that bad. A true Fashionista/o would know a good find when they see one .

  2. administrator

    FashionBoys – yes, some of their basic stuff and other things can be really cool. I have never seen one of their in store displays look anything but busted.

  3. Chloe

    Okay, most of this stuff is god awful, but I kinda want those leopard print heels… Don’t judge me! :]

  4. administrator

    No Judgements here. Well, ok, LOTS of judgements here, but, you know, not towards you.

  5. B Jonas

    FYI. From 1965 thru 1975 I was convinced that many of the “sport jackets” men were wearing were cut from the fabric of the awning of the Negresco hotel in Nice.

  6. administrator

    Haha B Jonas – would you like to guest post?

    ; )

  7. whatyoulookinat

    SO I LIKE LEOPARD PRINT! SO I LIKE WEARING MASSIVE DEAD RATS! I LIKE LOOKING LIKE A PROSTIUTION WHORE FROM 1983 THAT WAS CAST IN A MOTLEY CURE MUSIC VIDEO! WHAT?! WHAT?! WHATEVER! I DO WHAT I WANT! WHATEVER!………yeah. Cartman shops at F21….XD

  8. Jen

    Just a note on the text: proper term for “floor orgy” is “floorgy”. I learned that in college and it definitely applies to the amount of prints and rhinestoneage found in Forever 21.

    P.S. Forever 21 outfits? Perfect for floorgies. ;)

  9. administrator

    You learn something new every. Damn. Day. Thanks Jen!

  10. why is it that the one black mannequin has to be dressed like a hooker?

  11. administrator

    Racism!

  12. Mario

    I wonder how many leopards were killed to make all that clothing.

  13. administrator

    Mario – PLEASE. NONE. How many Polyester Monster’s were skinned to make all that clothing? Completely other story.

  14. Helen

    I know this was posted awhile ago but I just bought that leather/whore dress for Halloween. I can’t decide between 80s Madonna or just a straight up prostitute. My friend bought the same dress (we go to college 2000 miles away from one another so its fine) will be Catwoman. That is all.

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