Le Costume Post: Part 3

Day by day, bit by maddening patchwork, leatherette and leopard print bit, Forever 21 continues to release key pieces of costume outfits on the unsuspecting general public, disguised (poorly) as regular everyday clothing.

The following cardigan is a happy inclusion in the unintentional costume category.

Purl Knit Open Cardigan: $32.80

Part of what I hear Forever 21 is internally calling their “Homeless Haute┬áCouture” collection, this long cardigan lacks style, form, function and all sense of appropriateness for life in general.

It also probably smells like it looks, which is like unwashed ass pickled in street stank. No matter how hard I try and no matter how much I know it not to be true, I keep imaging the model’s face covered in a patchy beard with an even patchier grin peaking out of it.

I have issues.

Forever 21, Spare Change? What? Fuck you, I know you have some!

10 Comments

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10 Responses to Le Costume Post: Part 3

  1. MM

    When I was in 5th grade I was a hobo for Halloween and my mom sewed patches on a raggedy old jacket and jeans and I smeared black costume makeup on my face for a hoboey beard. If only we knew what fashionistas we were back then, setting the trends for today’s teens, Tweens, and brokeass cougars!

    Seriously though, you’re freaking hilarious.

  2. Paula

    “unwashed ass pickled in street stank”, HAHAHAHA! I’ll never look at a homeless person the same way again.

  3. Lori

    Really?! Really…I can’t imagine ever wearing that shit if someone gave it to me for free, let alone pay 32 freakin’ dollars and 80 freakin’ cents plus tax for it! Do you know how many hours I’d have to work to pay for it? Seriously, kids, that’s a full tank of gas right there!
    I’d pay a full tank of gas for it…to douse it with gasoline and light it up.
    But not really.

  4. administrator

    Yeah I noticed the high price as well, Lori. Kind of ridic. Why is it the ugliest shit always costs more?

  5. whatyoulookinat

    I like the shape and cut. But the fabric?! DUDE! It looks like something my grandma would whip up and think it’s “quilty-couture”. I love my grandma, don’t get me wrong, but she’s my GRANDMA! And what do grandmas do when they make stuff? They give that stuff as gifts….. man, I really couldn’t wear this, unless I’m going to the Thanksgiving potluck at the 4-H club. Then it would totally rock!

  6. This cardigan + the owl necklace from the previous post = my fourth grade teacher. Seriously. I’m going to rifle through my old stuff, find a class picture for proof.

  7. Jess the Mess

    So homeless people have had it right all these years?! What fashionistas! My newest accessory will totally be a bunch of bags with empty cans in them. Instead of paying an obscene amount to look like you have no money, how about just trading lives?

  8. administrator

    Haha. I would not be surprised to see a bag with empty cans on a runway. Not at all.

  9. administrator

    Please do that, Ginny!!! I will put them up on the Facebook wall if you do!

  10. Hakan

    l clean all my gold jewellery in toatmo sauce(ketchup), put in a small bowl cover with sauce and leave for a few hours, then rinse carefully in water (plug the sink) if tarnish is really subborn give a light rub while rinsing, l do this about every five months, the acid i think in the toatmo sauce just seems to eat it away

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